Friday, April 24, 2009


In surrogacy talk, these are two phrases that linger in our minds when we know that we are "supposed" to be pregnant. A few days after transfer, I started peeing on a stick every morning as part of my morning routinie. Ridiculous I know, but all too tempting. I know some ladies pee multiple times a day. That, I think, is too expensive and time consuming.
On day four after transfer (4dp5dt = 4 days past a 5 day (how many days since fertilization) transfer) I had a super, super faint positive. They kept getting darker, and darker, until I sent C and A a picture of one on day 7.

Then, last Saturday, I sent them a picture of the digital, "pregnant". It was so exciting! All of our efforts, time, pain, and suffering had worked. But, there is always a chance that it isn't viable, and that is where the pregnancy test comes in.

In IVF land/surrospeak, and apparently the medical community, a Beta is a number given to the exact level of HcG in a pregnancy test. High numbers are good, and numbers are supposed to double or triple every two days. So, on Monday, April 20, I went in for Beta number 1.
Beta number 1: 270- this is very solid and good.
On Wednesday, April 22, I went in for Beta number 2.
Beta number 2: 550- this is very nice. It more than doubled!

Good news- I am very pregnant!
Now, I just have to wait until May 7 for my ultrasound to see if there is one little bean or two little beans baking in my belly.
C and A are happy. They laugh every time I talk to them and I can feel the joy through the phone- it is that real.
Now, I feel like crap and am nauseated all day. The shots I give myself in my butt have created raised red marks, bruises, and huge knots under my skin. They get worse every day and I still have 4 1/2 weeks left of them. These are the downside. They upside: We are on the way!
I will be 5 weeks pregnant on Sunday. BIG SMILE! Only 35 weeks until I make N a big brother!!!

And we shot them in!!!

Transfer weekend was so incredible. Jason and I went down to Houston the night before so I wouldn't have to have the stress of the long (3 hour) drive to the clinic Friday morning. Luckily, we had no school that day and the kids' dad ended up being in town so he could take them for the weekend.
We went out to breakfast Friday morning with Angela (Jason's mom) and then began the transfer journey...
I had to drink an entire water bottle (20 oz) on the way there so my bladder would be full. Well, we got there and my lovely IPs were there. They were so nervous and excited, my heart was just so nervous for them! I had my labwork (yes, they sucked more blood) done, then we met with Dr. H, who went over the state of each embryo/blastocyst. Two were fully developed blastocysts that were rated at the highest rating possible. These are the two he chose to transfer. I drank more water to get my valium down- I was so excited for the valium!!! Sadly, I overfilled my bladder and the valium didn't kick in, so I went into transfer in abject misery.
The transfer itself was not painful; however, the lack of valium, the overfull bladder, the speculum pushing on the overfull bladder from below, and the ultrasound pushing (not so gently) on it from above, drove me to the point of actual pain. I was so, I mean completely, terrified that I would pee all over the good doctor. I think that he, the nurses, and my IPs thought I was joking. About midway through the procedure, I think I was actually begging them to "suck some of the pee out". I think they realized my pain then....
On a serious and beautiful note, the transfer itself was awesome. My IPs sat behind me (Heaven forbid they see my girl parts!), the nurse smashed my bladder from the side, and the poor doctor sat in the seat of honor! They insert this long tube, this man walks in with an incubator-but-cooler looking thing, and from it he did something I was in too much misery to notice. Then, as I am focusing all my power on the ultrasound monitor, I see this little blast shoot into my uterus. And again. The pain left in that moment as I could see this little burst of future-children shooting into my womb. It was one of the coolest things I have ever seen.
Somehow, through the pain, I could focus completely on that monitor. I saw this miracle occur inside of me, and I was so awed and humble, that for a moment, nothing else existed.
Then, they were done, the embryos were both in, and they let me pee!!!! I peed right past the catheter bag, into the whatever they had under it, and on my gown. I have never had so much pee in me before. (I know this is gross, but it is just the truth!).
Afterwards, I laid there in the "recovery room" with my IPs and C went to get Jason so he could hang out with us for the hour I had to lay still. I was perfectly happy with my empty bladder, but sadly, the valium never really did anything for me.
For brevity's sake, we spent the rest of Friday through Sunday morning with my IPs in a hotel. They fed me, helped me with my meds, A got to give me a shot in the butt!, and we truly got to visit and just get to know each other. It was a wonderful weekend. I would not trade it for anything in the world. They loved being able to watch the transfer and have a pictue of the babies blasting in there.
After transfer weekend, I am more sure than ever that helping C and A create a family is what I need to do. I am so excited for them and can't wait to see if we are pregnant!!!!

Hello, where have I been?

Life has been so incredibly busy lately. I haven't had time to open mail, reply to emails, or sit down. Seriously, one of my students gave me a movie to watch over Spring Break- which was about 4 (oh, heavens, maybe 5) weeks ago. I haven't even gotten it into the living room yet! I really want to have separate posts for each stage of my surrogacy so I can write a decent amount and not turn it into the longest blog ever. So, I am going to start with transfer weekend- since that is where I left off...

Thursday, April 9, 2009

It Is Tomorrow!

So, life has been completely crazy lately; I haven't even looked to see when I last wrote since I am about to leave again.
The One-Act Play went well, my students did a fantastic job, we didn't advance in competition, but are still hoping to do it for the school.
Triston and Braden are doing baseball and T-ball respectively now. It is completely time consuming and we go to about 4 or 5 games a week. Then practice. The only days we aren't baseball-ing are Sunday and Wednesday, and Wednesday is church and Sunday is church, so we have been running constantly.
In super fabulous wonderful blessed news, we are transfering tomorrow!!!!!! The egg donor apparently had a really hard time reacting to the meds, so the cycle just kept getting pushed back two days, two more days, two more days, until last Sunday when they finally were able to do the egg retrieval. They were able to get 16 eggs, and 10 fertilized, which was wonderful. I was able to meet and have lunch with the egg donor, and she is such a wonderful and sweet lady who is doing her best to help her cousin out!
The 10 little embies (embryos) were looking very strong on Wednesday, so we will do a 5 day transfer tomorrow at 12:15 pm. It is finally the moment we have been waiting for.
I have been feeling like a drug addict lately. Not only have I been taking my baby aspirin and vitamin every day, but I have been taking a steroid pill every night and an antibiotic four times a day since Sunday. That is finally over! I am used to the sticky estrogen patches by now, I don't think there are any little hairs left on my abdomen to pull off, but somehow there always are!
The worst thing I have done so far is the PIO (progesterone in oil). I take a 1 inch needle full of 1 cc of sesame oil (imagine the oil you use to cook with- looks and feels exactly the same), pierce my poor butt-flesh, and squirt it into my muscle. I was so scared the first time I started shaking and had to have someone else do it! At this point, the shot itself is nothing, but my butt is soooo sore. It feels like I worked out really hard, never goes away, hurts if I sit too long, stand too long, lay down on it, and I have huge knots already. The joyous part of this is that I have to do it until 9 weeks of pregnancy (or longer I think).
Aside from all of this medical nonsense, we will be transfering tomorrow!!! (Did I say that already?) Then C and A (the fabulous parents) and I will be staying at a hotel for the two days I am on bedrest. I am glad it has ended up being this weekend because now Jason will be able to go down with me, do the driving, and otherwise deal with everything for me.
Our IVF nurse says that they will have "two beauties" to transfer to me- so I am beaming with anticipation and joy. I am so excited to begin this journey with them and help them to become parents.
I have been so emotional lately (I am sure all the pregnancy inducing drugs) and when I look at my kids, I can't imagine someone not being able to have that same fullness of joy. I hope to have joyful tidings soon. As far as I understand thus far, we will be taking the official pregnancy test a week from Sunday- April 19.
I can't wait for the BFP (big fat positive)!!!!
Wish me sticky vibes tomorrow.